Red flags and romance scams
Date with an open heart and clear eyes. Here is what to look for, and what to do.
The biggest red flags when dating Christian singles online are a request for money, a refusal to video call, a push to move off the site quickly, and faith-heavy messages that feel copied rather than lived. Any one of those is a reason to slow down. A request for money, for any reason, is a reason to stop.
When you venture out and make connections with new people, you meet all kinds. Even though online dating is so accessible, you most likely don't want to date everyone. So how do you decide who to date, who to keep as a friend, and when to raise the red flag and leave them to it?
You often won't know the whole answer until you've met a person once or twice, or shared a few video dates. But you can learn a lot about someone before you ever go out with them. Here are the signs that help keep you safe.
Signs in the person
Not everyone who raises these is dishonest. They are still worth noticing early.
There's an old saying: if something seems too good to be true, it probably is. Make sure the people you date are the real thing: down to earth, genuine, open, honest and truthful. People who let God into their lives usually admit their faults and try to be the best version of themselves for the people they care about.
When you are committed to putting God first and living that out day by day, it is a big mistake to move forward with someone who is not similarly committed. There is little reason to invest in a romance with someone whose values are very different from yours.
Someone wrapped up in themselves is a taker, not a giver, and sees everything through their own needs. Conversation is one-sided: whatever you say becomes a cue to turn the attention back to them. In a healthy relationship both people give and receive. If someone ignores what you bring, they are telling you that you are there to serve them.
Romance scammers know that churchgoers tend to be trusting, generous and quick to help someone in need. Those are good qualities, and scammers use them. The pattern: warm attention, fast intimacy, a story, then a need.
In Matthew 10:16 Jesus asks his followers to be wise as well as innocent, sharp-eyed as well as gentle. Being careful is not a lack of faith or love. It is wisdom.
Christian Love gives you tools to check who you are talking to before you trust them. Members can pass a no-cost ID check and earn a verified badge on their profile, or confirm who they are in a quick live video check with a moderator, so look for the badge before you reply. Usernames keep your real name and email private, and your profile shows your nearest town, never your address.
The site warns you when someone tries to move the conversation to another app, which is one of the commonest scam tactics. You can block anyone instantly, and report them quickly from within the site. Read more on our safety page, or see is Christian Love legit for a straight answer about who we are.
When you are ready to meet, our first date tips cover meeting in public and getting home safely. There is more in our guides for Christian singles, including advice for men.
Refusing to video call, moving you off the site quickly, saying "I love you" within days, faith messages that feel copied, a life that keeps them far away, and sooner or later a request for money.
No. Never send money to someone you have only met online, however genuine the cause sounds. If you want to support mission work, give through your own church or a charity you know.
Report the profile on the site so our team can act, then report the fraud. In the USA, use the FTC's ReportFraud service or the FBI's Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3). In the UK, use Report Fraud (England, Wales and Northern Ireland) or call Police Scotland on 101. In Australia, use Scamwatch and ReportCyber. If money has left your account, call your bank at once.
Check for the verified badge. A member earns it by completing a free ID check. Ask for a video call before you meet, and keep chatting on the site until you are sure.
Get verified, look for the badge, and take your time getting to know someone who shares your faith.
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